Now that I am done crying, I can reflect on what happened. This morning, while letting my nephew drive us to school, I gave suggested that since there was a red light ahead he might want to start coasting. He is still a new driver and working with a driver's permit only, said well that is not what I am supposed to do. "In order to the pass the test, I need to keep my speed at the speed limit," he declared. Well I lost my cool and told him, "I have 40 years of driving experience and slowing down for an upcoming red light was more appropriate and that Joe could practice driving with him heretofore!" I was so mad so angry so upset, I just escalated my thoughts into, you don't respect me..... Now, after 2 hours of crying, anger, reflection, prayers and time, I realize I had no reason to be upset, as I made the presumption he did not respect me, when in reality, he was just stating what he thinks the rules of the road are. I wish I had the chance to redo this morning. If I had a redo, I would have just offered my driving guidance, accepted my nephew's response and let go. I would have placed no judgment on his response and the morning moments would have gone in peace. My outburst was rooted in anger instead of love. Oh dear, with all my practices of meditation, living in the moments, this mornings moments were not my best. I am forgiving myself in this moment and will seek forgiveness from my nephew when he returns from school. Maybe he will have already forgiven me or forgotten!
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