My name is Julianna

Last Friday evening our St. Catherine's vocation committee had its annual "happy hour with our Lord" celebration. While cleaning up at the end of the event a little girl, approximately 7 or 8 years old was helping me. I asked her name and she responded Julianna and then asked mine. We continued to clean together for several minutes and I said thank you Juliann and she quickly responded, "my name is Julianna with an 'a' at the end". The next morning I could not help but ponder the authenticity of children who state so confidently their name, their needs and their love without hesitation. Julianna symbolizes for me why God calls us to be like little children. Her authentic self, reflected so powerfully when she reminded me "my name is Julianna." How often do people not remember names upon a meeting and handshake and suddenly the name of the person is forgotten in a moment and we are too fearful of the embarrassment that our memory is that short or that we were not truly listening.

While sharing this story with Amy, my sister's partner in life, she reflected upon the funeral of her neighbor Lee. Lee's granddaughter, a little child age 8, stood up to share a story about her grandpa. The little grandchild did not really know Lee due to some estrangement in the family; however she had received a toy that Lee made for her when she was younger. She said grandpa made me a toy that I treasure for it reminds of him even though I did not know him. This child, like Julianna spoke without judgment or fear. Even Amy admitted she wanted to say something but the fear of public speaking overcame her and she was not able to get up and speak.

Children don't have that fear that occurs as we become young adults and adults. One day we grow beyond the authentic youth of being like little children, "fearless", where we call it as it is with no judgment. We become fear based adults who protect the self. I am sure that there is more depth than I can articulate in this fearless child's statement of SELF; however I will use it as a reminder to fear not as I fondly recall her statement, "my name is Julianna"!

Good friends water the soul and bring to heaven to earth

As I walked the other morning and observed Burlingame's big beautiful trees, I fondly reflected on my past weekend with my girlfriends. As rain and sprinklers provide water for tree growth, good friend are the refreshing water for my soul. This past weekend I was completely refreshed while moving through the most varied and fulfilling times with my lady friends. My yoga students on Saturday morning, all women who come together to practice yoga, bring a deep connection that permeates the large gym and brings calm to whatever may cause us to sway in life. Then Margaret, my former yoga teacher, a woman of wisdom and health treated me to lunch and nourished not only my body but my soul. I came home from both yoga and time with Margaret rejuvenated and was able to garden with ease and joy the rest of the afternoon. In the evening a group of 12 women friends celebrated with Jodi her bachelorette party at Tony and Tina's wedding, an active play where we play invited guests at the reception. Jodi's joy was all of our joy. Sunday came and Joan invited Diane and me to a Pacifica park. The sun shone as bright as can be and we did a meditation on Joan's picnic blankett where the senses were replenished from natures symphonious song including birds singing, the breeze stirring, bugs buzzing and nature fully alive in its glory surrounding us. The day was completed when Diane suggested we do the "eye of the tiger" workout which was a total cardio regime, ending with a gentle yoga practice. The weekend was filled with good friends who watered the roots of my soul, grounding me more deeply into the joy of ordinary life while allowing my soul to climb to the heavens as do the big beautiful trees in Burlingame.

Detachment, so elusive yet leads to true freedom

So many thoughts ideas and ponderings - are these attachments. Writing is an attachment or is it not the writing but the desire for someone to read and comment - oh that too an attachment. Recently my colleague David, in frustration with the volume of work and the desire to take a long break from it all said "why do we do it?" I know why I do, I am attached to the pride of success, the greed of commissions, the fear of losing the job, the need to be liked, my list could on and on to all my attachments. I stepped back after I said that thinking that was it, amazed by the revelation even to myself of how attached I am to feelings let alone the attachment to the material stuff of life: photos, artifacts, trinkets, books, and so many other little goodies I hold dear in this attached state of being. Even my physical body: attachment to being thin, in shape and better fitness, probably not all that bad to desire health. Joe and I often discuss my need to keep my refrigerator purged, cupboards practically bare, this attachment to something around control, I don't even get this attachment? In many of my spiritual readings they discuss detachment as a way to true freedom. I believe this. I long this and for today I will practice abundance, and know that all I need is within and found in bringing a generous heart to all and hope to experience freedom - oh no is that an attachment to an outcome?